As I sat in the airport this year on my way to British Columbia where we stay for several weeks to get out of the heat, it occurred to me that our process for closing up the house to ensure there are no awful surprises upon return might be useful. Many of these tasks are lessons I’ve learned the hard way. Some are obvious, but it’s always nice to have a checklist. You can adopt this to fit your situation. And let me know what my list is missing!

Before you leave:

1. Ruthlessly empty your fridge. Toss anything that won’t be good when you return. Many cheeses, breads and meats can be frozen.

2. Put your good olive oils and vinegars in the fridge. They go bad over time and heat accelerates the process.

3. Place any medications that should be kept in a cool dry place in the fridge.

4. Clean all surfaces to make the kitchen uninteresting to potential pests.

5. Empty all trash cans.

6. Run dishwashers. Don’t leave dirty dishes in the dishwasher.

7. Make sure there is no wet laundry in the washing machine.

8. Any pantry foods such as potatoes, onions, or garlic are suspect. If your house is warm and you’ll be gone for more than a week, I suggest giving them away or throwing them out before you go rather than doing it when you come home and find they have gone to mush.

9. Run your garbage disposals, then pour Fly-Zyme down your drains to keep drain flies and fruit flies from breeding. Learn more about this topic here.

10. To keep bugs from coming in, use insect spray along the thresholds of doorways that open to outdoors and the garage. I also spray it under the kitchen sink and along the outdoor entry to the garage to deter roaches from entering. This works! If you have indoor plants, it’s also a good idea to spray the water saucers because that seems to be a place bugs like to enter your plants and set up home.

11. Put a dash of toilet bowl cleaner in each toilet to keep a moldy line from forming.

12. Close the curtains to keep your home cool and private.

13. Go online and put a hold on your mail to the date you’re returning.

14. Go to your Amazon account and manage your subscriptions so that you’re not getting deliveries while you’re gone.

15. Discontinue or pause your subscriptions if you’re away for a month or more. YouTube TV, Hulu, physical newspapers and magazine subscriptions, etc. can usually be put on hold. This adds up and can save money.

16. Place water leak detectors next to the fridge, underneath every sink, and next to the washing machines to detect water leaks. Thse are inexpensive and can save you immense headaches. I’ve had my washing machine plumbing grow mold, then back up and spill water over the floor while I’m gone. I’ve had the water tube that leads to the ice maker break, and I’ve had the tube under the sink that goes to the water filter come loose while I’m gone. Each of these created a flood in my kitchen and ruined the hardwood floors. These water events are the most common source of insurance claims. If you use these sensors, you may be able to lower your home insurance premium. Here’s how they work. The little oval sensors sit on the floor or inside a cabinet in the area that water would fall should there be a leak. They connect wirelessly to the round unit that plugs into an electrical outlet. When a sensor detects the presence of water, (and they can tell if an ice cube has been dropped on the floor and melted!) an alarm goes off and you get an alert on your phone. You can then call someone to check on your house. This is a godsend and a lesson I wish I’d learned years ago.

17. We empty and unplug our extra fridge that we call the “party fridge.” It sits in our hot garage. By putting it out of commission, our garage stays cooler and I’m sure it’s better for the fridge and our electricity bill.

18. Make sure that your air purifiers are running. These filters will keep your house from smelling musty and stale. They also cut down on dust. I have one of these in almost every room, and can’t say enough good things about them. (We noticed our guest house was smelling musty and a bit moldy because of disuse, and once we got these plugged in and running, the air has stayed perfectly fresh. They are amazing.)

19. Turn down (or up) the thermostat five to ten degrees beyond what’s personally comfortable for the most energy-efficient temp while you’re not home.

Have someone come into your house while you’re away and do these things at least every two weeks:

1. Run water in each faucet at least once every two weeks. This is because your sink has something called a P-trap, which is the bend in the pipe under the sink. Water sits in this bend creating a seal. But when the water dries up, you lose the seal and foul sewer gasses can seep into your home. So by running water, you’re restoring the P-trap.

2. Flush toilets to keep them from growing a line of mold around the edges.

3. If you have Miele dishwashers, they need to be run at least once a week. Our Miele repair person told us that they actually deteriorate if they are not used. Who knew?

4. Water plants

5. Manage outdoor trash pickup

6. Check pool and/or pond levels and take care of any tasks associated with those.

That’s my list. I’m curious what you do that I’ve left out. Let me know. I’m sure everyone could benefit.

Bon Voyage,

Yvonne

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But.

About a year ago we began seeing tiny flies in our house. Annoying as hell. They were not fruit flies. (I know fruit flies from being in Canada every summer where ripe fruit falls on every square inch of the ground for weeks on end.)

These flies were slow and dumb. They would rather buzz around in my face and fly up my nostril during dinner than pay attention to the food. They love a glowing light in a dark room and will dance around on the surface of my iPad in the dark as I read in bed at night. They dart about in ways that are impossible to predict, and thus kill.

My first thought was that they must be coming from our plants. I ordered several products to treat the soil. I ordered little yellow sticky traps to place around the plants. I gave it time. But I caught very few. That didn’t work.

I tried spraying Clorox disinfecting spray in the sinks, on the sinks, in the trash cans. I also put lemons down the disposal to clean the system. The only time they seemed to be under control was after we returned from being out of town for more than two weeks.

Eventually, I had an enlightening conversation with our plumber and here is what I learned:

1. The worst thing you can do for your plumbing and disposal is to put citrus in it. Citrus fruit does not actually wash away. It ends up sitting down there in a million little pieces attracting/breeding fruit flies and other things.

2. If you put rice or pasta down the disposal, it doesn’t pass like you imagine. It turns into a gummy ball.

3. To clean your disposal, put ice down it and let the disposal cut it up. Then, put the stopper over your sink drain opening and fill the sink with very hot water. Take out the stopper while running the disposal to create a little flash flood in your sink, and all the hot water will rush down for a period of time during which any food that is in there should wash away where it belongs.

I also learned that we have something called drain flies. I’ve been living on this earth longer than I care to admit, and I’ve never heard of these. It was confirmed when I removed the plastic disposal cover from our sinks and noticed that the bottom of one of them was covered with tiny black larvae. I mean. Yuck. But also, Aha!

Most disposal covers are removable now. If yours are, I urge you to put them in the dishwasher once a week to give them a good scrub. We opted to replace ours (they are cheap) just to play it safe, which seems like a good thing to do every so often. God only knows what else grows on these things.

Once I knew what the real problem was, (drain flies), I found videos of plumbers suggesting you spray Raid Ant and Roach killer down your sink every night. Ok, that is not happening. But I did learn about, and eventually purchase, something else I’d never heard of. Fly-Zyme is a liquid / jell enzyme cleaner that basically eats up the organic matter in drains and prevents drain flies from breeding. It doesn’t contain insecticides or poisons and is safe for septic systems. Apparently, you can also put it in your shower and bath on a regular basis to control buildup of hair. (Hair in the drain is another topic altogether.) It doesn’t work like Drain-O if your drain is clogged. It’s more of a preventative that works by keeping it clear. They say to use it on your kitchen sink for five nights, then just occasionally. I also pour some down the inside drain of the dishwasher because — I mean isn’t that a drain too? I’m covering my bases. And it’s working.

I learned that fruit flies also propagate in drains, which is good to know, because I didn’t think there was a good way to control them other than keep fruit out of the house and keep your kitchen clean. When we stay in Canada, these are virtually impossible to control, BUT I have perfected the art of catching them in a flower vase containing apple cider vinegar and water. I insert a paper cone that I make with a tiny hole in the Bottom and then tape it around the top so the only entrance and exit is the tiny hole in the bottom of the cone. This works, as you can see.

Anyway, the takeaway here is that both drain flies and fruit flies breed in drains faster than fancy traps can catch them. So if you want to control these, it’s a good idea to:

• Use enzyme solution in your drains occasionally.

• Empty the trash every night.

• Keep food sealed or in the fridge. (This is, in my world, impossible. So just do your best.)

I hope you avoid ever seeing one of these in your home. I think mine are finally gone for now. But are they ever really gone?

Vigilance!

Yvonne

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To make your cold, juicy, crunchy, tangy watermelon salad, you’ll find that the hardest part is picking a good melon, then carting it into your house and heaving onto the counter.

Melon 101: Procuring your melons

To pick a good melon, check the spot where the melon rested on the ground. As melons sit in the field, the bottom part that’s in contact with the ground turns yellow. You want a yellow belly. A white belly, or no belly, means it’s not ripe yet. However, if it’s dark yellow, it’s overripe. And if you press on a melon and it has mushy places, it’s overripe. No bueno.

Also check the skin of your melon. As watermelons mature, their rinds develop a dull matte coating that actually preserves the water content within the melon. So rather than select the bright green shiny melon, go for the darker dull one. Also look for dry brown spots on the skin. These are known as “russeting.” And areas that look more web-like are called “webbing.” Larger areas of webbing typically mean you have a sweeter watermelon.

Since watermelons are 92% water, the heavier your melon, the juicier it will be. A watermelon that is lighter may indicate that is is overripe and has started to dry out. Then there’s the slap test. If you slap it gently and it sounds hollow, chances are it’s ripe. And finally, a round watermelon tends to be sweeter and less watery than the traditional large oval type.

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Here is how it’s done.

You’ll need:

• 1 large ripe beefsteak or heirloom tomato (One tomato usually makes two servings)

• Stracciatella cheese

• Olive oil (the best you can get)

• Crunchy salt

• Small fresh basil leaves for garnish

Take a large tomato and submerge it in a small pan of simmering water for 15 seconds. Remove it and slip off the peel. You will have a large peeled tomato.

Next, slice the tomato about 3/8” to 1/2” thick. You will only get two slices from the widest part of each tomato. Use the rest of the tomato for something else.

Then take a ring cutter that matches the size of the core of the tomato, and punch out the yellow/green core. (I love this set of ring cutters because they come in a range of sizes and you can pick the one that will just punch out the right amount of tomato core. You can use these for a hundred other things, too, like biscuits, cookies, etc.)

Once you have your tomato with the center removed, set it on a paper towel and sprinkle it with crunchy salt, preferably Maldon, and chill it in the fridge for up to an hour. It’s also nice to chill your plates.

When it’s time to serve, place the tomato on a chilled plate. Carefully spoon stracciatella cheese into the hole in the center so that it comes up to the level of the tomato. Drizzle a tiny bit of olive oil around the tomato. Just enough to make a thin green ring. Then decorate the tomato with small basil leaves. If you have them, some thyme blossoms or chive blossoms are really beautiful too. And Voilà!

Your friend,

Yvonne

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If you make a purchase through one of these links, I might earn a commission. However, I only recommend items that I already own, have used, and believe will be a good addition to your kitchen.

Enter the agua fresca. These drinks are light, non-alcoholic and refreshing. They’re made by blending fresh fruit with water, ice and a touch of sugar. They are healthy, hydrating, and much thinner than a smoothie. Also much more interesting than anything you might get from a can. And OK, you COULD set a bottle of vodka on ice next to them and let folks spike them if that’s what they want.

If you need to add to your supply of interesting party pitchers, any of these options would be beautiful. At left, a hand blown pitcher that is also gorgeous filled with flowers. Or, a contemporary columnar pitcher with an interesting handle, a more traditional columnar shape, and a traditional option. Each one has its own personality. And they look great next to each other.

Hot tip!

When making drinks like this or even cold soups like gazpacho in a blender, many times you will find your drink or soup has too many bubbles. It can ruin the experience of consuming them. To fix this, after you finish blending, turn your blender down to the lowest speed for about one minute. As you blend at this low speed, you will begin to see bubbles coming up through the liquid to burst at the top. Blending your liquid at the lowest speed causes the air to escape, for some reason I cannot explain.

You WILL need a good blender. And this is the best, in my opinion. Each of the agua frescas below can be stored in a pitcher in your fridge for up to three days. Each recipe yields about 6 to 8 servings, or 2 quarts.

Pineapple orange and basil agua fresca

The pineapple tends to froth up a bit when blended, so I make this 30 minutes ahead and chill it to give it time to settle down. Then I take a spoon and skim off the head of foam just before serving.

• 2 cups ice

• 6 cups water

• 1/4 fresh pineapple cut into pieces

• 1 orange, peeled

• 1/4 cup sugar

• 4 fresh basil leaves (optional)

Place the ice and 2 cups of water in the serving pitcher.

Place the pineapple, peeled orange pieces, sugar and 4 cups of water in the jar of your blender and blend on high until well blended. Add the basil and blend until no small pieces remain.

Pour through a strainer into a serving pitcher. Chill until ready to serve.

Pear and pink peppercorn agua fresca

Pink peppercorns do not have the sharp hot flavor of the black peppercorns. They are fruitier and provide an unexpected compliment to the fresh pears. It’s best to use ripe pears. Any type will do.

• 2 cups ice

• 6 cups water

• 2 ripe pears, stemmed, cored and peeled

• 2 tablespoons freshly squeezed lemon juice

• 1/4 cup sugar

• 2 pinches of pink peppercorns

Place the ice and 2 cups of water in your serving pitcher

Put the pears, lemon juice, sugar and peppercorns with remaining 4 cups of water in the jar of your blender and blend on high until well blended. Taste and add more sugar if you want it sweeter.

Pour the mixture through a fine-mesh strainer to remove the slightly gritty consistency of the pear.

Grapefruit-ginger agua fresca

This has a gorgeous pink color and is full of vitamin C.

• 2 cups ice

• 6 cups water

• 1 1/2 oz ginger, peeled and cut into rounds

• 1/2 cup sugar

• 1 1/2 cups freshly squeezed grapefruit juice

Place the ice and 2 cups of water in your pitcher

Put the ginger, 4 cups of water, sugar and grapefruit juine in the jare of a blender and blend on high until well blended. Taste and add more sugar if desired.

Pour through a fine-mesh strainer into the pitcher and chill until ready to serve.

Cucumber, mint and lime agua fresca

Something akin to spa water. I would love to have this sitting in my fridge at all times.

• 2 cups ice

• 6 cups water

• 10 - 20 mint leaves, washed

• 1/4 cup freshly squeezed lime juice

• 1/4 English cucumber, peeled and shopped (Reserve a few thin slices for garnish)

• 1/2 cup sugar

• Place the ice and 2 cups of water in your serving pitcher

Put the mint leaves, lime juice, cucumber, sugar and 4 cups of water in the blender and blend on high.

Pour through a fine-mesh strainer into the serving pitcher. Chill and garnish with sprigs of mint or slices of cucumber.

Cheers!

Yvonne

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Many people are surprised to discover that apricots have a completely different flavor after being cooked. They become tangy, creamy, and acidic. They are wonderful both ways: cooked and uncooked. I love to grill them briefly, then use them in a simple salad of watercress (or arugula, or even lettuce) and torn buffalo mozzarella. They are still sweet, softened and tangy. The grill pan imparts nice marks, but you will want to oil it to avoid sticking.

Apricot salad

Serves 4

• 4 Fresh ripe apricots

• 1 Buffalo mozzarella ball torn into chunks

• 4 handfuls of watercress, arugula or torn lettuce

• 1/4 cup olive oil

• 2 tablespoons champagne vinegar (white wine vinegar will do)

• 1/2 teaspoon dried thyme

• Salt and pepper

• Balsamic vinegar for drizzling

1. Cut the apricots in half and place on a grill pan wiped with a bit of olive oil. (If you don’t have a grill pan, use a carbon steel pan on medium low heat with a dab of butter in the pan.) When apricots have softened slightly, they are done. Let them cool.

2. Mix the olive oil, vinegar, thyme, salt and pepper to create a dressing.

3. Arrange greens on salad plates. Tear the buffalo mozzarella ball into rough chunks and place a few pieces on each plate. Arrange two apricot halves on the greens and spoon dressing over each salad. Drizzle each one with good balsamic vinegar.

Apricots also make a delicate desert with almost no effort at all. If you want something light, fresh and relatively healthy, this is a lovely choice.

Fresh apricots with almond cream

• Fresh ripe apricots

• 1/4 cup of the best cream cheese

• 1/4 cup of creme fraiche

• 2 tablespoons amaretto

• 1 tablespoon sugar

• raw almonds (one for each half apricot)

1. Toast the almonds in the oven at 350 degrees until they are golden and fragrant.

2. Mix the creme cheese and creme fraiche. Add the amaretto and sugar to taste.

3. Cut the apricots into halves and remove the seeds. Place a dollop of creme in the center of each apricot and top with an almond.

You could use small peaches for these recipes, too, if apricots are not showing up for you. Either way, you’ll have good results.

Yvonne

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Remember the canapé?

Tidy crunchy flavor bombs, consumed in a single bite, are as beautiful to behold as they are to taste. Canapés are served room temperature. They consist of:

• a base that does not become mushy (cracker, endive leaf, toasted pita piece, puff pastry, toasted baguette round, hollowed out cherry tomato, etc.)

• layered with a spread (any cheese mixed with creme fraiche), or a fig spread, a savory relish, a caviar spread, a caramelized onion spread, etc.

• topped with something tasty (small piece of smoked salmon, slice of fresh fig, small piece of smoked duck breast, crab salad, inexpensive pink salmon caviar, a black caviar that is affordable, etc.)

• and a garnish (toasted pistachio nut or walnut piece, caper, piece of roasted red or yellow pepper, fresh herb sprig, etc.)

These are meant to travel from the tray to the mouth via two fingers and be consumed in a single delicate bite that is NOT a mouthful and doesn’t drip on your dress. They are truly divine when done well.

How to create a Canapé

You’ll want to prep all the parts for your canapés ahead of time and keep them in sealed containers until assembling at the last minute. First, select the base for your canapé. It should be one inch or less in diameter. I prefer less. A very narrow baguette can be sliced thin (1/8”) and toasted with a little melted butter brushed on top until crispy. A pita bread can be sliced into a tiny pizza-shaped base and toasted. Small rice crackers are nice. You can also use a single endive leaf as a base. My favorite is puff pastry.

To make a puff pastry base*, thaw the pastry sheets in the fridge for a day, then take out a sheet and lay it on parchment paper. Don’t roll it. Simply take a knife and cut small squares or rectangles. I love to use several shapes, then decorate each shape with a different topping. I use a circle cutter about 3/4” in diameter. Put your cutout shapes on a parchment covered baking sheet. Chill the cut shapes for about 30 minutes then pop them into a 400 degree oven until they are golden. If they are not cooked thoroughly, they will become chewy within a few hours. To ensure they remain crispy, let them sit in your oven on a proof setting at about 90 degrees for an hour after baking them. They will not continue to brown at that temperature, but they will become very crisp and stay that way for a day or so.

*If you don’t have any desire to fool with all this puff pastry business, you can buy pre-made puff pastry shells or these even better shells that are actually very nice.

Once the puffs are cooked and cooled, you can slice them in half and make tiny sandwiches, or use the halves by themselves.

The fun part

You can get really creative here. You will need very little spread. In fact, a total of 1/4 cup will probably be too much. I like to use about half creme fraiche and half soft cheese of some sort. A goat cheese, blue cheese or finely grated parmesan are all wonderful. Mix in a bit of finely chopped shallot if you wish. Then spread this over your base. This bottled pepper and onion relish is wonderful as a base with the blue cheese and creme fraiche mixture on top. That’s enough by itself, but you can also then add a tiny slice of smoked meat (I love smoked duck breast) or smoked salmon.

It’s beautiful to decorate the top of each canapé with a tiny piece of fresh dill (for a seafood base), a single tiny toasted walnut (for the blue cheese base), a toasted pistachio nut, or a single caper.

Avoid anything that must be held together by a toothpick. If a toothpick is necessary, your canapé is too big. Your guests will be looking around for some place to put their used toothpick, which is an awkward distraction.

Presentation!

Since the art of canapés is about visual appeal just as much as taste, it’s important to have a small pretty tray, about the size of a plate, to place your canapés on. I love to have old school linen cocktail napkins, too. Just to take the whole thing over the finish line like you know what you’re doing.

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There’s a good chance they have done things that are unthinkable today. They have had fun in ways we can’t even imagine. Time spent with them will likely be unforgettable.

And yes, they are more troublesome and finicky. It’s easy to put it off.

On my list of lifelong regrets, my failure to nurture and fully discover these fleeting relationships is right up there.

You know that their criteria for an enjoyable evening is different from yours. But don’t let that stop you. Times a wastin. These guidelines are a starting point. And yes, I’m generalizing. These may not be accurate for everyone, but this will put you on the right track.

Start early.

Ask your guests when they like to start their evening, and don’t be surprised if it is 6:00. Or earlier. We have friends who make 5:00 dinner reservations and are happy to be home by 7:00. Let them set the schedule and be ready to accomodate.

Turn the music way down.

Hearing difficulties are definitely a thing for people of all ages. If you’re lucky, your older friends will have hearing aids that work. It’s definitely not beneficial to have a strong bass rhythm throbbing in the background. For some guests, even soft background music just registers as interference.

Make sure your home is accessible.

If your guests are not 100% nimble on their feet, then plan their entry and exit before even thinking about inviting them. Stairs or steps without a handrail are usually a hard no unless you’ll be there to ensure they navigate them successfully. It’s always a nice touch to walk them to their car when they leave. They always resist help. Just insist. It keeps them safe and shows that you care for them.

Keep them seated comfortably.

Your guests beyond a certain age will probably not enjoy standing up with a cocktail for more than five minutes. Before they arrive, work out where they will sit for drinks and clear a path so it’s easy for them to get there. Make sure their seats are comfortable (no backless hard benches and no low seating that’s hard to stand up from.) When it is time to move to the dining table, allow 5 minutes for them to get resituated. I suggest serving meals plated (vs. buffet) to avoid requiring them to carry plates to the table.

Know their tastes.

Many of our older friends have developed strong preferences. One friend HATES frisee. Another will not eat shellfish. Another is diabetic. Some want their beef “blue” while others will only eat it well done. Etc.! This creates serious limitations to work around. But there are menus that are generally acceptable for most people with strong preferences.

I generally avoid things that require the rigorous use of a steak knife, such as thick steaks on a bone. (These can be presented pre-sliced so they’re much easier to deal with.) Experience has taught me to also avoid dishes with strong black pepper, raw onion or spicey spice. Also boney fish and big messy burger-type things. Or bowls of long stringy pasta.

Prepare food ahead of time.

Your senior guests probably won’t enjoy standing in the kitchen while you stir risotto. Work out a menu that requires minimal last minute cooking, and can be popped on the table without missing a beat.

Serve small portions.

This is the very opposite of feeding people in their 20’s who want LOTS of food. Think about making very small beautiful tastes of things that they can enjoy without any expectation that they must be stuffed from the experience. For instance, a single peeled roasted tomato with a pinch of sugar and flakey salt, some good olive oil, and a single basil leaf is a perfect treat sitting next to a small piece of beautifully prepared fish (in yummy sauce) nestled in about 1/3 cup of flavored rice alongside 4 small asparagus tips.

Have conversation prompts in mind.

Some guests no longer speak up like they used to. They may have a hard time hearing. Their voices are softer. They no longer jump into the conversation. It helps to have some questions queued up to engage them and allow them to shine, have fun and enlighten the group. I’ve found that asking about something they are proud of from their past is all it takes to light them up. Then tease out the good stuff and have a wonderful time asking questions. When it’s good, it’s very very good.

Seize the moment.

Nothing lasts forever.

If you’d like a good menu that fits the criteria above, let me know. I can post that, too, if it would be useful.

Your friend,

Yvonne

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Our two-week stay at Troncones ended on the eighth day because of a totally preventable snorkeling mishap. As my husband and I were returning from a glorious snorkeling excursion, we misjudged our location on the return path to shore. We thought we were swimming back the way we came, but in fact we cut a corner around an extended rock reef. Strong waves swept us into an expanse of sharp rocks that lay just below the surface. They were COVERED in black sea urchins.

It was like being in an underwater tornado. I grabbed the rocks to stabilize myself and prevent being completely raked over them. But in the process, the sea urchin spines broke off in my hands and body. After several minutes of this — a surreal span of time that seemed like forever—I managed to perch on a rock (covered in sea urchins) until a wave receded. Then I scrambled ahead another few feet until I was safe from waves. My husband, Tom, who is a much better swimmer, was worried I might drown since I had gotten closer to the rocks and was more overcome by the waves than he was. Once he saw I was safe, he pushed off with his feet (getting a pin cushion of spines as a souvenir) to escape the strong current, and swam the 500 yards back to shore. He had used his emergency whistle, and a man on the beach made his way out onto the expanse of rocks with a pair of woman’s flip flops for me to wear back to the beach.

¡Qué horror!

Trembling and totally freaked out, we walked back to our house and stood under the outdoor pool shower to evaluate our situation. I was in shocked survival mode. The skin on my forearm was a mess, even through I was wearing a sun shirt, and we were badly cut and bruised. Our friends helped me cut off my shirt and we started pulling spines out. I stared down at my leg, horrified, as awful little tree trunk-like spines were extracted. They were 1/4” long. However, after a few minutes, the skin swelled from a reaction to the spines, and they were no longer accessible.

We knew we needed professional help, so we drove to the clinic. The Troncones “clinic” is on a remote dusty dirt road conveniently located just across from the cemetery. The doctor(?) wore an old Simpson’s T-shirt and spoke not a word of English. Still, between us, we could understand that he had no hydrogen peroxide or tweezers.

He did have the skill to numb my arm, cut off some large flaps of skin, and bandage it. But the spines? He advised not trying to remove them. Too painful. He recommended soaking them in hot water mixed with vinegar. Since the spines are comprised of calcium, they should theoretically dissolve. I wanted to ask: How do they dissolve if they are below the surface of the skin? How long does this take? What if that doesn’t work? But my Spanish was insufficient.

Leg soup.

Back at the house I was confronted by practical questions like: How does one soak a whole leg in hot water in a place with no bath tub? Just how hot should the water be? How much vinegar? After lying awake that night unable to sleep, I limped from our casita to the main house, put a big pot— the kind you might cook spaghetti in— on the stove until the water was hot, then carried it back to the casita and added vinegar. I set the pot next to the bed, bent my leg and set my knee down into the bottom of the pot so the water would reach my upper thigh. I leaned my body onto the bed and tried to rest. But the pot cut into my thigh and calf since my bent leg doesn’t squeeze into a pot as easily as I’d expected. I quickly determined this was bullshit. I tried to go to sleep, but the stinging on by bottom from literally sitting on the spines was breathtaking. I was amazed by the amount of discomfort. I kept going into the bathroom to take photos of body parts I couldn’t see to try and understand how they could possibly hurt so much.

The next morning, Tom and I both clearly saw that we had to go home. We hired a driver, got to the airport and limped to the plane in a daze. Once in Austin, we headed straight to the ER.

No one at the ER had ever treated sea urchin spines. We were the weird case everyone wanted to check out. I had the feeling they were privately consulting AI to try to learn what to do with us. After the X-rays came back, the head doctor sat down next to me and solemnly explained that “this is going to be a process.” He said he would try to get as many out as he could, but I’d need to see a hand surgeon and probably another specialist for the leg.

A Kendall Roy dream.

First there was morphine. Then came the Ketamine. I left that room and went somewhere much much nicer in a dreamy fog. However, I could still feel a hideously annoying sharp nibbling at my leg and hand as the doctor quickly dug in and picked spines out that were just below the surface. I am reported to have screamed, “No, no, no, no no,” endlessly at the top of my lungs for the entire time. After doing his best, the doctor bandaged me up and we went home.

A man is a very heavy thing.

That doctor was right. It was (and continues to be) a process. The x-ray of my hand showed 10 spines that needed to be removed surgically.

The next week, my husband had spines removed from his foot by a foot surgeon. And three days later it was my leg’s turn.

It was quite a circus at our house. Tom had no experience on crutches, and I could not use my right hand. He almost fell on me twice getting from the car to the bed when I got him home from the surgery center. I tried to help him navigate from the bed to the bath room, and was amazed by how big and heavy he was. What a production! What if he fell? The lesson here is to practice getting up off your chair using only one leg. You never know when you’ll lose a leg.

The process continues DIY.

After two emergency room visits, three surgeries and several procedures between the two of us, we continue to extract spines that the doctors missed. One day, out of the blue, Tom dug a 1/4” spine out of the bunion in his foot. By himself.

Two and a half months have passed. Today a toddler asked what was the “purple thing on my arm,” and I found myself trying to explain what a scar is to a 3 year old. I’m convinced I still have some spines in my leg. But how far do we take this before we just learn to live with it? I’m still trying to decide.

Please let me know if you have any advice,

Yvonne

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(This is all things I found wonderful about Troncones. Part 2 will be details about what happened after our visit. Stay tuned!)

As we drove into Troncones, I was struck by the overall crumminess of the little village. Tiny dusty shops lined the potholed one-lane roads. Skinny dogs darted through shadows. Flies. And dimly lit grocery stores the size of a one-car garage. It seemed like there was nothing in Troncones that I’d ever want or need.

Yet, the village is on the verge of transformation. Well-architected homes are under construction on the beach . If you can see through the scrubby trees and over rough walls, you’ll find several nice hotels. Nothing is apparent at first glance. It’s one of those places where you can still experience a fairly primitive lifestyle, then go to bed on clean sheets in an air conditioned room. When I was in my twenties, I was OK sleeping in a hammock on a Mexican beach and huddling in a public concrete block restroom in my wet sleeping bag in the middle of the night when the rain came. No more. Nope. I sort of want it both ways. I want the innocent primitive place, but I don’t want too many mosquitos. Until developers take over and ruin it, that is what you can have now in Troncones.

We settled into a routine of foraging for food, cooking, and swimming at a beach called Troncones Cove, which is just steps away from the house. Most of the shore is comprised of sharp dark rocks that are covered by sea urchins just below the water level. These beaches are PRISTINE! No trash. Nothing gross washed up from halfway around the world. (And no beach maintenance either.) I thought I’d never see another natural beach so nice.

We often swam in the mornings, then enjoyed a world class chicken caldo at Los Raqueros, a small inn on the ocean with the kind of beachfront dining you dream about. No reservations needed. Just wander up from the beach in your wet bathing suit and take a seat at a table in the sand.

In Troncones, I found ladies selling fresh snapper and shrimp in the mornings. We bought 3 kilos of shrimp (way to much!), some butter, chilis, lemons, garlic, white wine, rice, etc. and headed home. To ask six people to stop lounging by the pool and come help peel, devein and clean 3 kilos of shrimp is a true test of friendship. But they did. And that night we seared the shrimp fairly dry on a hot plancha, then heavily doused them in a garlic, chili, lemon butter sauce and served them with saffron rice made with broth from the shrimp shells and lots of fresh herbs. We had so much left over that we made a taco bar the next day for lunch with fresh tortillas, Mexican cheese, and all the fixings.

Our favorite restaurant, Indigo, is a small rustic Argentinean steak house by night with a small panaderia off to the side. Breakfast and lunch are also a rustic treat of traditional Mexican fare served open air by beautiful gentle people who are not in a hurry for anything.

And then, like it landed there from outer space, we found a gleaming modern glass air conditioned cafe and coffee shop, Cuatro, that is so spiffy it could be in Austin. I’m afraid it’s only a matter of time before more things like this crop up and crowd out the small family run restaurants. Still, it is a beautiful change of pace, and they do make excellent coffees and lunches.

During the next few days, we made our way into busy Zihuatanejo to buy delicate lettuce from the farmer’s market and fish from a fabulous fish market, Pescados y Mariscos Peke. And we discovered the best grocery store in Troncones, Fruteria Yahve, which turned out to have everything on my list! You just have to ask. Cilantro? A woman rummaged behind the milk in an old fridge and brought out some wet newspaper with whole cilantro plants tangled up inside. Roots and all. That sort of thing.

We found a sweet family operation to rent snorkels. And we discovered a tiny tortilla factory, Tortillerias Don Celso, run by lovely people just beaming with pride in their products. (Not to be found on the internet or Google maps. Just ask.)

This coastal area is on the path of the migrating whales in late winter. (We were there in late February.) We saw several pods of whales from our house. They must have been feasting on a dinner just along the shore.

Truly hard core surfers are drawn to this area. The Pacific ocean is no joke. An utterly ruthless bully. Not for sissies like me. But we swam out in surfer territory for some of the best snorkeling I’ve ever found straight off a beach. We swam with a huge sea turtle and were enticed out further along the rocks where clouds of fish enveloped us in waves of color. It was glorious. The rough water almost gave me a panic attack, but I enjoyed it more than I was afraid.

Slowly, over the next few days, I shed my squeaky clean spoiled American lens and discovered that just about anything I needed was in Troncones. I fell in love with the simplicity, the slow pace and the kind people. How can you sit outside a tiny shop on a wooden stool all day selling mangos and be filled with joy? Loving life. Erupting in conversation and laughter. They do it there. It’s a rare life skill that many of us lack. I’d go back in a minute.

Your friend,

Yvonne

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I love combining these rather common and uninteresting ingredients to create a 5-star meal that’s visually gorgeous, has a crunchy yet softly comforting texture, and is super healthy. The silk purse of dishes. This is a meatless meal in a bowl. Enjoy it outdoors with a glass of dry minerally white wine or late at night straight out of the fridge.

This recipe is more of a guide. If you don’t have all the ingredients, it’s OK. Just go with what you have. I think the specialness is created with the combination of Castelvetrano olives (be sure to buy these pitted), whole toasted almonds and feta cheese. It’s nice to serve these in a shallow bowl with a piece of crusty bread and olive oil.

Tip: I found a video in which Eric Ripart shows how he cuts up a zucchini. It’s brilliant, and I recommend it because it eliminates some of the spongy middle of the squash. He cuts the squash lengthwise into halves. Then cuts each half lengthwise to get four long sections. Finally, he slices out the white seedy center sections of each piece. This leaves the firm flesh.

Another tip: This is nice with both zucchini and asparagus. But if you just have one or the other, that’s OK. Just go with one veggie and up the quantity.

One more tip: I sometimes crumble a tin of sardines into this salad to give it a real mediterranean vibe with even more protein. If you do this, consider upping the lemon zest and juice.

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I know the idea of making a salad sometimes seems boring. You’re not sure what to do, but also don’t want to go to too much trouble. I hope this will make it easier. My generalized rule of thumb for an interesting salad beyond a pile of dressed lettuce is that it should contain:

Greens of some sort. This is seasonal. Winter, include endive and arrugula, summer use the more delicate seasonal lettuces.

Nuts or seeds. This is seasonal too. In fall/winter, use toasted walnuts, pecans or hazelnuts. In Spring/Summer, use seeds such as toasted pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds, and sesame seeds. Toasted almonds and pistachios are wonderful year round.

Cheese. For winter, a blue cheese or crumbled aged white cheddar are nice. For summer, I love burrata or feta. Goat cheese and parmesan are good choices year round. You can also add grilled halloumi.

Fruit or vegetable. Avacados are always delicious, especially with grapefruit, fennel and pistachios. In general, for winter, you can use thinly sliced apples or pears (which are lovely with blue cheese and toasted walnuts), citrus slices or pomegranate seeds. Dried fruit such as apricots and dates are nice. Winter vegetables that are wonderful in salads include thinly sliced fennel, thinly sliced raw kolrabi, roasted butternut squash, and roasted or raw carrots.

For summer fruit, try peaches (or any ripe stone fruit) or berries. And for veggies, crisp poached asparagus cut into pieces, thinly sliced radish, and of course tomatoes. Thinly sliced zucchini is wonderful too, as are fresh corn kernels and green peas.

Optional: meat. The addition of a protein turns your salad into a meal. You can fry slices of proscuito in a about a tablespoon of olive oil until it is cooked, then let it cool. It will become thin, salty and crispy. This is a wonderful garnish. Thin slices of smoked salmon are beautiful with many salads. Or try a flavorful dusting of shaved botarga, a delicacy of salted, cured fish roe, typically from grey mullet or tuna, known as the "prosciutto of the sea". This will keep in your fridge for a while and adds a wonderful umami. (If you use a botarga or salmon, you’ll probably want to eliminate the fruit component.)

Dressing. A basic salad dressing is all you’ll usually need. A finely chopped shallot marinated in a teaspoon of sherry vinegar with a good squeeze of lemon juice. Then mixed with 1/2 cup olive oil, a teaspoon of whole grain mustard, 1/2 teaspoon of dried thyme, 1/2 teaspoon of dried oregano, salt and pepper. Bam. That’s it.

THE SECRET: If you’re using nuts in your salad, incorporate specialty oils such as hazelnut oil, walnut oil, or almond oil into the dressing. Just a couple of tablespoons makes an enormous difference. Keep these oils in the fridge because they go rancid sitting out. They will keep a long time in the fridge.

If you are using citrus in your salad, instead of the sherry vinegar, use blood orange vinegar. If you’re using pears in your salad, use pear vinegar. And if you’re using berries, use raspberry vinegar. These vinegars are very special, and will keep in the fridge for a long time.

Another nice touch is a crunchy sea salt as garnish. This adds a bit of sparkle and texture to the final masterpiece.

Here’s how it all comes together:

When a friend told me that her doctor said she had tested low on iron and this was the explanation for her low energy, I realized that I’d never thought much about iron. Then I researched it a bit, and created this recipe that is FULL of iron AND protein. I was surprised that it really does make me feel great. And bonus, it can sit in the fridge for days. I’ve pulled it out for a last minute meal in a bowl and delivered it to friends who feel under the weather.

This healthy hearty soup is a light lemony meal in a bowl. Top it with greek yogurt and an extra slice of lemon to squeeze on top. (Apparently, our bodies cannot assimilate iron unless it is accompanied by something like lemon. Who knew?)

The texture is enhanced by partially blending this soup. Stick an immersion blender straight in the pot and blend until the texture is slightly creamy but still has lots of toothy texture. Or, if you don’t have an immersion blender, put half of the soup in a countertop blender. But don’t overdo it. You do not want a smooth puree.

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This is one of the most delicious and interesting desserts I have ever tasted. I was first treated to this by a friend who travels extensively in Middle Eastern and Asian countries. It will delight everyone! And it’s very difficult to tell what is in this once it’s all put together. The nice thing about this is that it requires no real cooking. The only work is in getting all the ingredients together. You can buy orange flower water in most good grocery stores or liquor stores. (It contains no alcohol.) It is almost like a perfume. If you can’t find it, the dessert is still wonderful, but not as exotic.

We have friends whose list of things they don’t eat makes entertaining a challenge. No red meat. No dark chicken meat….the list goes on and on so that it’s fairly difficult to create a pleasing menu. I prepared this chicken piccata for them, however, and they were all smiles. This chicken will almost always please even a picky child, and at the same time you’ll receive approval from your more sophisticated eaters.

I like to get all the prep work done ahead and have every ingredient measured and ready to throw together in quick succession. Slice the breasts in half and pound them earlier in the day, then store them in the fridge separated by sheets of parchment paper. Pounding to consistent thickness ensures they will cook fast and evenly. I normally bread the breasts just before guests arrive. Thats the messy part. I put the breadcrumbs, egg and flour containers in the sink. When I’m finished, I wash it all down the sink so the mess is contained.

When guests arrive, you can heat the pan, cook the chicken, and construct the sauce in about 20 minutes. If you are serving your chicken with rice, you can make that an hour ahead, too. If you wish to cook more than two breasts at once, it’s helpful to use a two-burner stovetop griddle. This gives you more real estate to cook three or four at once.

You can serve the chicken with rice, pasta tossed in the sauce (make extra if you go this direction) or mashed potatoes. It is lovely with a small green salad of watercress and spring onion, too.

This recipe will provide two pieces of chicken per person. (Each breast cut in half yields two pieces.) This is quite a large serving. Most people are happy with one piece of chicken, or half a breast. However, this chicken is excellent the next day as a sandwich or sliced and put over a salad, so it’s not bad to have leftovers.

In winter, we want something luscious and warm. In summer we want something light and fresh. Somehow, this is both. I came up with this combination when I had very little in the fridge, yet wanted to create a little dinner, pronto. I write my notes down as I go in a notebook, just so I’ll remember.

You can create this in the time it takes to cook your pasta. Let me know what you think!

I’ve tried cooking racks of lamb and rib chops, as they are known when cut into individual pieces, in every way imaginable. This simple method wins over all others. The lamb is rich. So plan to serve two or three chops per person. It’s important to prepare this lamb dish medium rare. If it is too done (solid brown throughout and dense to the touch), it loses its juiciness and becomes tough and no fun to eat. Too rare (still raw in center), and it’s hard to cut, and a lot of work to chew. If you want your lamb to be just right, this is a great approach.

I like the lamb from New Zealand that Costco sells. The quality is excellent, and it’s about half the price of what you’d find at a good grocery store. These lamb shanks do not have excessive fat, as some do. If you find your lamb has more than ⅛” thick layer of fat, then trim a bit off.

A grill pan is perfect for this preparation. They leave sear marks on the meat and allow the fat to fall below the surface of the meat. However, a plain large plain cast iron pan also works just fine. If you’re looking for a good grill pan, you can spend a lot. But this version is super affordable and reversible, meaning it’s flat on one side (great for pancakes!) and has ridges on the other side for dishes such as this.

The hazelnut pesto will be slightly crunchy from the toasted nuts, tangy with lemon, and smooth enough to slather over each bite. After you toast the nuts, there is no cooking involved. Just whiz it all together in a food processor!

Serve your lamb and pesto with a tidy round of Mushroom Bread Pudding and a few spears of roasted asparagus.

Table manners note: it’s perfectly acceptable to hold your lamb by the bone with your fingers and gingerly nibble away. That’s half the fun.

Quintonil: This is listed as one of the top 50 restaurants in the world. It’s a special occasion. The food is amazing. And expensive. We really don’t think it was worth the trouble. They are processing tourists through the restaurant and it doesn’t feel as authentic as the other restaurants I listed above.

Read more

If you’re planning to go, I recommend you buy the book, This is Mexico City, by Abby Clawson Low. It’s full of interesting places with photos and descriptions. We took it with us, and we were glad we did.

Transportation

Arrange to have a driver pick you up at the airport. It’s fine to use Ubers around the city, but for your arrival, having a car service pick you up is worth the small cost.

Where to stay

We stayed at this AirBnB in Roma. It was beautiful for two people. It is on the ground floor of an old home in Roma. The apartment opens up onto a walled garden. This place is quiet. Quiet is hard to find in Mexico City.

We tried Casa Golina. It’s an old home in a great part of town that’s been turned into a boutique hotel. It’s very charming, but I’m super sensitive to noise, and found it a bit loud.

The next time I go, I plan to stay in this charming place in Roma, Ignacia Guest House. Or this place which looks nice. I also want to try this place outside the city. And this hotel called Downtown Mexico City looks interesting. If you want to stay in Polanca, Casa Polanca is a nice choice.

One of the greatest treats you’ll experience in the city is the food!

Where to eat in Roma and Condessa

Madre cafe is gorgeous. You’ll sit outdoors in a garden patio under trees and enjoy a fresh, authentic brunch or lunch.

Delirio: There are two locations. There’s a small café for breakfast and lunch called Abarrotes Delirio that’s on a quiet side street. And a larger restaurant a few blocks away in a grand building where you can sit on the sidewalk or eat inside. Their pastries are beautiful and their breakfast is very nice.

Niddo is another wonderful breakfast and lunch spot. There are two locations; one in Juarez and one in Polanca. The food is creative. The pastries are a work of art. It’s small and quaint.

Café NIN: This very cool spot is on a delightful street called Havre in Juarez. It’s in a very old building that’s a blend of indoors and outdoors. There are lots of small wonderful little places near NIN on this street that are so intriguing. (We never saw any tourists at this gorgeous place.)

Lardo is our favorite restaurant in Mexico City. You should have a reservation here. You can eat at the bar which is super fun. They have a fresh fig pizza and always offer many creative dishes.

Eno: Eno is Chef Enrique Olvera’s group of three affordable cafes (Olvera also did Pujol). It’s a casual breakfast, lunch or dinner spot.

Maximo Bistro dowsn’t have a website. This is exquisite food in a small restaurant in Roma. Sit inside. Sometimes it gets quite loud in the outdoor seating because of the mariachis. They serve a gorgeous eggplant butter with bread once you’re seated. I asked for the recipe.

Maximo Bistro Eggplant Butter

Ingredients

• 2 large eggplants

• 1 garlic clove

• 3 oz. goat cheese

• 2 ½ oz.olive oil

• salt and freshly ground pepper

Instructions

Char the eggplant: Place the whole eggplant directly over a high-heat gas burner. Rotate it frequently until the peel is completely blackened and scorched on all sides and the flesh has collapsed.

Prepare the flesh: Once cooled, remove the stem end and scrape the soft, smoky flesh into a blender or food processor.

Blend with ingredients: Blend the eggplant with the garlic. With the blender running, slowly drizzle in the olive oil until the mixture is fully emulsified into a smooth, creamy purée. Once the emulsion has formed, add the goat cheese. Then season the dip with sea salt and freshly ground pepper to taste.

Serve: Serve the smoky eggplant dip with crusty bread or grilled toast as you would butter.

Havre 77: this is a less-known restaurant that is owned and run by the same people who own Maximo Bistro. I prefer it because it’s not as busy. It’s in an old grand home. It’s a very romantic place to sit and sip drinks. They also have a room with a raw seafood bar.

La Docena: If you like seafood, this is your spot. This bohemian seafood restaurant in Roma has things you’ve never seen before. They have the regular oysters and things you’d expect, but also giant clams from the pacific ocean that they chop into a ceviche right before your eyes and serve on the shell. We had a 5” section of a palm tree that was split down the middle and then grilled to present a “heart of palm.” I recommend you sit at the bar where you’ll be able to see what they are concocting, than ask for one yourself. You can drink a fresh coconut, too. With or without rum.

Azul: This restaurant has three locations. We love the one in Condessa. It’s a traditional, more formal Mexican meal. You’ll find large tables of businesspeople arriving around 2:30 in the afternoon. They have a lovely outdoor patio.

Huset: This Roma restaurant has a beautiful outdoor patio with filtered light through a canopy of vines. They also have a stunning bar. We enjoyed an avocado pizza and many other distinctive dishes.

Rosetta: This is in a beautiful old funky house in Roma. The food is very creative. The best way to experience this menu is to order as many things as you can and share.

Contramar: This is a hip, fun restaurant focused on seafood where all the business people go to be seen. Honestly, I think it’s a bit too much of an institution with lots of tourists, though it’s listed in all the guides. I put it here to say, “Meh, maybe skip this one.”

Primos: This is a beautiful French-style bistro serving some French and some Mexican food. It’s near the park in Condessa and is a gorgeous place to sit outside for any meal.

Ingredients

• 1 1/2 lbs. fennel (about 2 large bulbs), stalks removed, halved lengthwise and cut into 1/2” wedges

• 1 1/2 cups heavy cream

• 1 cup finely grated Parmesan cheese

• salt and pepper, to taste

• 4 tablespoons unsalted butter, cubed

Instructions

Heat oven to 425 degrees.

In a bowl, toss together fennel, cream, and 1/4 cup Parmesan cheese; season with salt and pepper.

Transfer to a 3-qt. baking dish (or individual serving baking dishes); dot with butter. Cover dish with foil; bake for 60 minutes.

Uncover baking dish, sprinkle with remaining Parmesan cheese. Bake until fennel is tender, about 30 minutes.